Find out to use journaling to help you forgive and let go of old grudges. Become a better version of yourself one day at a time to feel happier and fulfilled.
Whether it’s a family member who has disapproved of us one too many times, a boss who belittled us, or a friend who was disloyal one time too many, we all have memories that hurt.
These memories can be:
- Events,
- People, and/ or
- Experiences.
For different reasons, we can get stuck holding on to the pain and other feelings associated with them. Despite the suffering these memories cause, we struggle to let go of them.
When we fester on these hurtful experiences, these feelings can turn into grudges. It can be consuming and impede our ability to become the best versions of ourselves.
Create space to let go
Not all grudges are the same.
While we might be aware of many them, there can be others, smaller ones; we don’t acknowledge.
Sometimes, it has to do with how recent they are or their results.
Either way, we should try to forgive.
My two favorite methods to unveil and let go are meditation and journaling.
Meditation
While I don’t attach any goals to my meditation practice, it has already happened more than once that hurtful events and people have come to the forefront during that time.
A couple of times, the memories associated were of pain and anger.
Even though they had happened many years before, I realized I wasn’t able to let them go.
Learn how to acknowledge and overcome pain with journaling. #coaching #mentorship #journaling Click To TweetThey weren’t big enough to influence my actions or performance. Yet, they were extra weight I was carrying inside.
And needless to say, they became burdens I should have gotten rid of a long time ago.
For these cases, the simple act of sitting and allowing the memories, thoughts, and emotions to flow, was enough to let them go.
When I had the chance, I also contacted the people involved and talked to them about the experience.
The relief we both felt was freeing.
Journaling
Unfortunately, not all grudges are the same.
Sometimes, they are related to:
- Bullying,
- physical harm,
- humiliation,
- Lies, and
- Injustice.
In some cases, our reputation, career, and relationships pay the price for situations caused by others.
These tend to be harder to let go. Mainly if we still suffer the consequences of those acts.
We should ALWAYS fight for our rights.
Wrong is wrong and shouldn’t be left unpunished.
But revenge and grudges can’t be our drive for justice.
That’s when letting go can help us out.
Learn how to separate revenge and forgiveness to be fulfilled. #coaching #mentorship #journaling Click To TweetFor such cases, I find journaling more helpful.
I write down everything about the situation:
- What happened,
- My feelings,
- People involved,
- When I felt triggered,
- The results,
- How I think it should have been solved, and
- Why I find it hard to let go.
Focus on one event at a time and don’t force yourself to solve the grudge all at once.
In my experience, I always learn something new about myself each time I work on painful memories.
This way, even if I apparently don’t achieve my objective, I take significant steps towards becoming a better version of myself.
That alone is a victory!
And it leads me to heal later when the time is right.
Use journaling to help you forgive
Start slow.
Journaling means something different for everyone.
Don’t get attached to a specific format or concept.
Just let it flow.
The more spontaneous it goes, the better the results. Also for forgiveness.
And, as you progress, you’ll notice improvements in your:
- Stress management skills,
- Mental and physical health, and
- Productivity
To get started, join other planners and high-achievers for motivation, accountability, and support.
Come to the 52-Week Challenge For A More Productive You today.
Learn how you can overcome grudges and other efficiency killers one day at a time with journaling.
Before you go
Can you answer the following question in the comments below, please?
How do you deal with things hard to forgive?
