I called my brain tumor surgery the time for a reset. It was a reset to have my “present” removed and start a new phase in my life.
Before you start reading, let me advise you that the content of this blog personal.
As I mentioned in “Getting Out Of The Closet,” I was diagnosed with brain tumor in 2012. For various reasons I delayed the surgery for as long as I could, but the time has come.
By the time this blog will be posted, I will be getting ready to go to the hospital, first for tests, and tomorrow, on Friday 3rd, 2015, the surgery itself will take place.We all have a story to tell. My #thoughts before my #braintumor #surgery. Click To Tweet
I cannot put into words how hard it has been for me not to be able to plan anything ahead, just sit down and get things done for “today”. It is a paralyzing feeling that I still need to get accustomed to because that is how my life will be for the next weeks (months?!?): one day at a time.
Getting back to my daily activities is at the moment just a dream that I want to make come true as soon as possible.
This journey has been beyond special to me. It is a journey back to my heart, to my soul and my beliefs. I have changed so much since I came here (to Belgium) that I almost could not recognize myself anymore. The rejection and isolation had brought me to dark places, and I ended up getting used to them. However, they are not who I am and therefore, they do not define me.
I am grabbing this opportunity life gave me to reset, to set things back on track and I am 100% convinced that I will make it!
With that said, I have to admit that my last day at work was hard. I ended up staying 12 hours in the office because I simply did not know how to leave. There was still so much I wanted to do…
The same after my last training at the CrossFit. I have become so much stronger, and the possibilities are endless. The thought of getting back to training is one of the things keeping me together these days. And I am glad I, at least, got the chance to “play” in the new box before the forced hiatus.
There is still so much I want to accomplish. Even though I am turning 40 soon, I never felt so young.
The years passed way too fast, and there is still A LOT I want to make come true. There are so many people and places I want to see (again)! I may not be able to make appointments at the moment, but nothing stops me from dreaming.
As soon as I get the chance, I will be posting updates (see links to my social media below). I know I am not alone in this path. Besides my family, relatives and friends, there are many others out there overcoming similar struggles together with their beloved ones. If I can bring hope and inspiration to at least one person, my mission will be accomplished.If I can help at least one person with my #story, my mission will be accomplished. #braintumor Click To Tweet
I would like to thank those who knew about my tumor from the beginning but were discreet about the subject.
Those with whom I did not talk about my condition, please understand that it was not an easy topic to me. The fear of being treated differently was also something that I wanted to avoid at all costs.
Yes, I have migraines. Yes, I can hardly sleep. But so do most of the population under the (di)stress of modern life. The only thing “special” about me is that my condition was timely discovered while most people go through the worst before knowing what is really happening to them. Besides, there is the emotional aspect. It is incredibly hard for me to look into people’s eyes and discuss the matter, even for someone like me.
I am truly looking forward getting back in action. Staying as fit as possible while I recover is a number 1 priority for me. Even though it is still not clear what I will (and will not) be able to do in the coming days and weeks, I built up a nice collection of mobility tools I cannot wait to start using during my recovery.
Before closing this blog, I would like to thank all the support I received my entire life. Life lessons are sometimes hard, but it is a blessing when you have people around who help you overcome obstacles. And for the ‘obstacles’, thank you for helping me see a side of things I did not know before and for helping me become a stronger person.
See you all again very soon!
For other posts about my brain tumor read also:
Please check the list of link parties I join here.
Be Healthy and Live Fully.
* NOTE: Not all headaches are related to tumors. Still, if you have concerns, do not hesitate to discuss it with your MD to look for the best option in your case.